Is Life Without Testosterone Really A Life Without Desire?

[4everLimp (imported)]

I once read from an author who became castrated due to cancer and could not do TRT that he defined life without T as a life without desire? Does this ring true with anyone not replacing T? I went without it for 3 years before deciding to begin TRT and it made some sense. There was really nothing I desired, sex, hobbies, reading, favorite tv shows, movies. But it was a life full of calm and clear thoughts. Just wondering if these observations are true to the rest of the community.

[Valery_V (imported)]

I once read from an author who became castrated due to cancer and could not do TRT that he defined life without T as a life without desire? Does this ring true with anyone not replacing T? I went without it for 3 years before deciding to begin TRT and it made some sense. There was really nothing I desired, sex, hobbies, reading, favorite tv shows, movies. But it was a life full of calm and clear thoughts. Just wondering if these observations are true to the rest of the community.

I very rarely took testosterone, I did not take other hormonal drugs at all ...

I still have hobbies: sports, reading, favorite TV shows, movies.

My training and career at work were not affected. I have always maintained good relationships with friends and work colleagues.

[dee2essohkay (imported)]

I once read from an author who became castrated due to cancer and could not do TRT that he defined life without T as a life without desire? Does this ring true with anyone not replacing T? I went without it for 3 years before deciding to begin TRT and it made some sense. There was really nothing I desired, sex, hobbies, reading, favorite tv shows, movies. But it was a life full of calm and clear thoughts. Just wondering if these observations are true to the rest of the community.

desire? yes, absolutely!!! but not for sex. sex, I believe was destroyed for me for all time by things that went on in my life as a child and then my struggles and failures growing up and living an adult life. it took me years to figure out that I actually needed castration and then I had to fight for the opportunity. and the fight unfortunately left me odds with some people. I blame all this on testosterone. I very clearly have a proactive desire to NEVER NEVER be on testosterone again. for me it's bad stuff and I will make sure it never comes near me. this I see as desire. not lack thereof.

I'm not interested in sex. that has been pure disaster all my life but I do envision myself holding a woman and giving her love with wherever love might now come from me.

I desire estrogen. I'm hoping it will moderately feminized me and my desire to hold remains with that woman mentioned above accepting of the new me.

I write. my creative mind is more active than ever. this too comes from desire. I hope to continue submitting my writing and eventually get something published. when that happens, I won't be stopping. I most definitely want to keep at it with all my heart and soul.

food!! I love food. when hungry I satisfy my hunger, but I love food so much, you can bet I'll be finding delicious stuff that is not necessary for physical sustenance but just to satisfy my desire for flavor and texture sensation. and I desire to not get fat too.

my walks in the park. keeping at it as best I can. to see the trees, hear the birds chirping, watching the squirrels and chip munks, being in a forest with nature. I love it and desire it as much as ever if not more.

I suspect that a lack of desire could come from something else that maybe a sudden loss of testosterone triggered, or maybe false expectations. losing my T, was like freeing me up to desire all the more, the things in my life that work.

[justapup (imported)]

Are there some things that I desired before my orchiectomy that I do not now? Oh yes, but I really just see them as growing out of a phase. I just went to pride dressed in a cute Non-binary outfit, then danced the night away with drinks and friends. After I got some quality time with a great friend of mine. ;3 Every night I get to go out with him we end up playing. Being off of hormones hasn't changed sexual desire. Has definitely helped me to stop having constant boners.

[WheelyCurious]

Worth noting that depression is one of the often reported side effects of castration, especially w/o hormone replacement w/ either T or E... I suspect (but don't know for sure if there is any definite evidence (maybe ask Jesus? )) that it would be more common in cases of involuntary castration...

What the OP describes, sounds more to me like depression than a lack of T...

WheelyCurious

[4everLimp (imported)]

Thank you ALL for your input and experiences. I do have a history of depression even before castration. It seems that the lack of T seriously increased it. Along with the fear that I will be alone for the rest of my life. I have started medication for depression and have been on TRT for a couple years, this seems to have helped. I just wish I could be happy without Testosterone. I hate the effects of it. I want the calm and the experience of observing life without the tilted view of sex all the time, the side effects are terrible. I hate the hair, the smell, the thoughts, the feelings that T gives me. I have never felt like a male and dont like the male things that T is causing. Maybe I am lonely, I know I am scared to try to meet others for fear of rejection because of what I have done. After a marriage, divorce, and now a grown child I still dont understand my gender or sexual orientation. I just know I've never been happy as a male full of T. I guess I am proof that YMWV. I am so happy without my hated testicles being physically present but I seem to be not able to share that happiness with anyone else. I dearly appreciate this site and the community that is here. Thank you so much.

[WheelyCurious]

Thank you ALL for your input and experiences. I do have a history of depression even before castration. It seems that the lack of T seriously increased it. Along with the fear that I will be alone for the rest of my life. I have started medication for depression and have been on TRT for a couple years, this seems to have helped. I just wish I could be happy without Testosterone. I hate the effects of it. I want the calm and the experience of observing life without the tilted view of sex all the time, the side effects are terrible. I hate the hair, the smell, the thoughts, the feelings that T gives me. I have never felt like a male and dont like the male things that T is causing. Maybe I am lonely, I know I am scared to try to meet others for fear of rejection because of what I have done. After a marriage, divorce, and now a grown child I still dont understand my gender or sexual orientation. I just know I've never been happy as a male full of T. I guess I am proof that YMWV. I am so happy without my hated testicles being physically present but I seem to be not able to share that happiness with anyone else. I dearly appreciate this site and the community that is here. Thank you so much.

Have you looked into the option of going on Estrogen instead of T? No idea if it would work for you, but at least some have reported that going on E avoids the downsides of being 'hormone free' like depression, and also doesn't have the side effects of T that you dislike so much....

Downside of E is the potential for feminizing (i.e. getting boobs) which may or may not be a negative for you... Some varieties of E also have some associated health risks that you should consider, ideally working with your medical team if possible...

WheelyCurious

[ssxx6767xxss (imported)]

I think it’s a valid concern because castrated man will have too low testosterone which may cause depression. So yes with depression there’s no desire and no life. I have depression and it’s the worst even though my testosterone level very normal. It’s very important to lesson to your body, but I don’t think no testosterone will lead absolutely to no life. I believe the author couldn’t cope with his new life with overwhelming emotional lose of testosterone which he did not want and did not prepared for.

[WheelyCurious]

I think it’s a valid concern because castrated man will have too low testosterone which may cause depression. So yes with depression there’s no desire and no life. I have depression and it’s the worst even though my testosterone level very normal. It’s very important to lesson to your body, but I don’t think no testosterone will lead absolutely to no life. I believe the author couldn’t cope with his new life with overwhelming emotional lose of testosterone which he did not want and did not prepared for.

My opinion only as a non-professional, but it seems like there are lots of things that can cause depression, some 'medical' like loss of T, some 'situational' like loss of a loved one, seriously disabling injury (I'm really familiar with this one!) and sometimes for no obvious reason...

In the case of the original quote, I see medical in terms of loss of T, but also 'situational' in the loss of balls and related sexual function, so a 'double whammy' of cause.

However it seems that the actual depression is pretty much the same regardless of what brought it on, and while addressing the causes may be a good treatment, it isn't always possible... The important thing is to handle the depression by whatever means necessary...

So while castration / low T may trigger depression, it doesn't follow that there are not options for treating the depression that do NOT include trying to bring the T back up. It seems to me that in the case of someone that was involuntarily castrated, T replacement might not be that helpful since the loss of the bits is still an issue... So I don't see the cause as being as critical to treat as the depression is - get the guy past the depression and he will figure out the rest on his own....

WheelyCurious

[JesusA (imported)]

The first of the Eunuch Archive surveys asked questions about depression. What was surprising was the that number stating that they suffered depression was exactly the same both before and after castration. They were not, however, the same individuals. Some who were not depressed before were depressed after castration. Some who were depressed before castration were not depressed after. Some had no change in depression status.

Depression is a very serious matter and requires professional help. If you are depressed, do not hesitate to see a counselor!