Tobin's Brat Camp - Part 1

[bella (imported)]

Part 2 has just been submitted. I hope you enjoy it.

Atreyu

Slightly delayed, should be up tomorrow

[Atreyu69 (imported)]

Slightly delayed, should be up tomorrow

I'm waiting with bated breath.

[TopManFL (imported)]

Atreyu69,

Hey, it's an excellent introduction to what I already can see will be a great series.

The setting in the autonomous driving RV, being out in the desert with the Josuha Trees, and the stars visible. I lived in the Coachella Valley for 15 years and the landscape and lack of manmade light is indeed a feeling different than other places I had lived such as Miami and San Francisco. After Hurricane Irma, once we'd moved back to central Florida, we could see the Milky Way and more stars than most city folk would believe existed. Adding those details to the story, changed the feeling of Kit's conversation with his dad. It creates an ominous feeling - one that will most likely happen.

Creating part one of a series can be so difficult because there can seem to be an impossible to ignore need to explain everything - a need that you have perfectly navigated. By that I mean, you've given the reader the fact that Kit reads magazines and enjoys them. But, you've left room and time to explain more about his preoccupation with the new trend of snipping off your brat's bits and pieces as a treatment for disobedience.

Lake Tahoe is one of my favorite places. However, I've always gone there from the other side of the mountains. I love arriving in South Lake by driving up Hwy 50 from Auburn because I prefer the South Lakeside. However, coming up 80 from Sacramento is a fast drive but, drops you off in North Lake and then you have to drive around the lake which is a drive I don't much like.

One story idea is the gambling available on the Nevada side. Tobin's could give the bookmakers the basics on every new arrival and then odds would be placed on if they keep their stingers and balls or if they leave smooth. Kit's father could watch the odds and then when nobody was watching make a very sizeable bet on Kit's status on leaving Tobin's. However, it would be so much fun for the reader to not know which way Kit's father wagered.

I would have left a comment sooner but, I've been a bit under the weather. Things are fine and I'm going to make a full recovery - just had some ups and downs.

[CircItaly (imported)]

I'm a little disheartened, I miss the long stories saga. Will be this a new one? Reading your story is an emotional effort to me, my heart jumps so hard that it hurts in my chest, because my childhood was exactly like your stories. Of course, I wasn't nullified just tightly circumcised, but at that time I didn't knew the difference. So I need some kind of conclusion to complete my catharsis

[Atreyu69 (imported)]

I'm a little disheartened, I miss the long stories saga. Will be this a new one? Reading your story is an emotional effort to me, my heart jumps so hard that it hurts in my chest, because my childhood was exactly like your stories. Of course, I wasn't nullified just tightly circumcised, but at that time I didn't knew the difference. So I need some kind of conclusion to complete my catharsis

I'll see what I can do about that. Anyway I just missed the deadline. Part 3 of Brat Camp has been submitted.

Atreyu69.

[bella (imported)]

I'll see what I can do about that. Anyway I just missed the deadline. Part 3 of Brat Camp has been submitted.

Atreyu69.

Should upload that tomorrow, had a long day and just gone to bed! (started 4.30am, now 10.30pm here!)

[Atreyu69 (imported)]

I'm a little disheartened, I miss the long stories saga. Will be this a new one? Reading your story is an emotional effort to me, my heart jumps so hard that it hurts in my chest, because my childhood was exactly like your stories. Of course, I wasn't nullified just tightly circumcised, but at that time I didn't knew the difference. So I need some kind of conclusion to complete my catharsis

This will sound strange but in a way I've always envied the guys who were cir'ed as tweens. They get to experience most of the emotions of castration without actually being castrated. That would really be amazing. I was cut as a baby so I have no memory of it.

[CircItaly (imported)]

When I found out that I will be circumcised I felt like my dad just sold me to Lester DelRay

[Atreyu69 (imported)]

When I found out that I will be circumcised I felt like my dad just sold me to Lester DelRay

You know, I've been thinking. Perhaps Lester DelRay really isn't such a bad guy after all. Perhaps I've just given him a bad reputation. He must have some good qualities as well. Maybe it's time I wrote some stories where he's the Good Guy who saves boys from poverty and neglect by matching them up with caring and loving men.

For a reasonable price of course.

[Paolo]

It's been so long since I read any of those stories (by many different authors) that I don't remember what character traits he developed over time.