I’m confused and am asking for answers

[Michael2614 (imported)]

Hi all. I’m a gay man that likes the idea of penectomy for years. I like my dick but also do unusual things with it that I have read about that says I’m doing things that could mean body dysphoria. I like my penis tortured and twisted. I have big nipples because I love playing with them and pulling them. When I’ve had sex then a guy plays or sucks my nipples I get very horny. I see other guys I to this but I also always like my cock bent or twisted between my legs so it doesn’t look like I have a penis. I do this slot and I like the feeling and look. Sometime I wonder what it would like to be a man with a vagina. I don’t hate my dick and it’s not like I think I would be better off with out it. I prefer a guy twist my dick and twists it between my legs and play with my big nipples. I do have fantasies about not having a dick. Am I really a Woman in a Mans Body Even so that I don’t want to grow breast. Grow my nipples yes. I’m confused. The idea of not having a dick turns me on. Should I take female hormones for a short time to see if I can grow bigger nipples and feel more like a girl to see? I’m happy being masculine. This has happened for over 20 years. Anyone feel the same or have ideas?

[TopManFL (imported)]

Hi all. I’

m a gay man that likes the idea of penectomy for years. I like my dick but also do unusual things with it that I have read about that says I’m doing things that could mean body dysphoria. I like my penis tortured and twisted. I have big nipples because I love playing with them and pulling them. When I’ve had sex then a guy plays or sucks my nipples I get very horny. I see other guys I to this but I also always like my cock bent or twisted between my legs so it doesn’t look like I have a penis. I do this slot and I like the feeling and look. Sometime I wonder what it would like to be a man with a vagina. I don

’t hate my dick and it’

s not like I think I would be better off with out it. I prefer a guy twist my dick and twists it between my legs and play with my big nipples. I do have fantasies about not having a dick. Am I really a Woman in a Mans Body Even so that I don’t want to grow breast. Grow my nipples yes. I’m confused. The idea of not having a dick turns me on. Should I take female hormones for a short time to see if I can grow bigger nipples and feel more like a girl to see? I’m happy being masculine. This has happened for over 20 years. Anyone feel the same or have ideas?

Hey @Michael2614,

First, welcome home. You are in the right place.

Your confusion about your desires is similar to many prior posts on here. Please take some time to read the sticky notes on the various forums. You will find so much good information there.

The answers you are seeking will come from yourself. Therapy with a qualified therapist that deals with BID issues would most likely help you a great deal. Of course, that is expensive

Facing the issue of loving your cock twisted, bent, hurt, and also wanting it gone is common. In many ways, not having a cock to hurt during sex would be the ultimate frustration and an extreme form of CBT - if only in your mind.

One important thing about eunuch.org is that there are four parts. This forum is where you will find information that is serious - although there is a section on the forum for lighter topics. The fiction section is exactly that, it is fiction. The personals section is for dating. The chat room is a place to find both serious chatters and fantasy.

I am looking forward to seeing you on here. One last thing, you cannot post pvt messages until after your 5th forum post.

TMFL

[Frida G Cavic (imported)]

hello and welcome

[cutnbulls2ox (imported)]

You might just be at a different place along the infinite range of the continum between being totally male and the opposite extreme of being totally female. Just enjoy your body and don t think you need to be limited to only choosing to be all male or being all female. You might be somewhere in between those extremes.

[notsomanly (imported)]

You might just be at a different place along the infinite range of the continum between being totally male and the opposite extreme of being totally female. Just enjoy your body and don t think you need to be limited to only choosing to be all male or being all female. You might be somewhere in between those extremes.

I agree with this perspective. I had no idea that I was born a woman in a male body until recently, yet all the signs were there in hindsight. My realization started with hating my body hair, then my male sex drive, then experiencing the joy of reduced or castrate testosterone levels and lastly taking female hormones. One step led to the next and I felt ever more my true feminine self. I'd thought I'd be satisfied becoming a eunuch, but that wasn't the solution for me.

[Frida G Cavic (imported)]

I agree with this perspective. I had no idea that I was born a woman in a male body until recently, yet all the signs were there in hindsight. My realization started with hating my body hair, then my male sex drive, then experiencing the joy of reduced or castrate testosterone levels and lastly taking female hormones. One step led to the next and I felt ever more my true feminine self. I'd thought I'd be satisfied becoming a eunuch, but that wasn't the solution for me.

you always were a woman notsomanly but you needed to pass a process before accepting you as a woman that´s why this is a transition, but this is not the case for everybody I´ve read that just about 1% of the populations is transgender

[Michael2614 (imported)]

Hi, I don’t know what’s happening to me. Last week I had a needle and decided to stick it in the head of my cock. It felt good feeling something tearing into my cock. When the needle came out I felt amazing. Over a week I’ve progressed to 12 needles. I love the idea something is hurting my cock and stabbing it. I’m trying to resist because it’s making me feel like I’m getting it cut off. As i mentioned my nipples are my cocks and wonder should I try oestrogen? To grow bigger nipples. As for the penis. I just want it tortured and removed. I lived in fantasy fir years but the banding changed things and now needles are really making me feel I can cope with out the penis. Am I needing to get help? Is this also normal for people like us?

[TopManFL (imported)]

Hi, I don’t know what’s happening to me. Last week I had a needle and decided to stick it in the head of my cock. It felt good feeling something tearing into my cock. When the needle came out I felt amazing. Over a week I’ve progressed to 12 needles. I love the idea something is hurting my cock and stabbing it. I’m trying to resist because it’s making me feel like I’m getting it cut off. As i mentioned my nipples are my cocks and wonder should I try oestrogen? To grow bigger nipples. As for the penis. I just want it tortured and removed. I lived in fantasy fir years but the banding changed things and now needles are really making me feel I can cope with out the penis. Am I needing to get help? Is this also normal for people like us?

Hey Michael,

Yes. You are normal. I would recommend taking it easy on play piercings until you've learned some good safety habits. First, only brand new clean needles should ever be used for play piercings. It is very important to have access to help if something goes wrong. The best help would be someone with you to call for help if you were to hit a vein and start bleeding badly. Lastly, some training in how to keep things sterile and safe - play piercings are a common fetish and you should be able to find information online.

Remember, any puncture into the body carries a risk of infection. So, you will need to invest in equipment to minimize that. Disposable gloves, one time use play piercing needles, sterile draps, and a sharps container to dispose of the used needles.

I know that you might think of getting an infection in your cock as a good thing but, infections spread quickly and can become sepsis.

Stay safe,

TMFL

[Valery_V (imported)]

I sympathize, but I cannot torment "him" any more...

[seanthomas (imported)]

My wife is a LILL (late in life lesbian), or more specifically bisexual, and as a joke I told her not long ago I could have my penis turned into a clit if that would appease her lesbian side and make her happy. She replied that it would be "interesting".

The other day after returning from my doctor I taped my inverted little guy inside and as we were going to bed took off my underwear to reveal an apparent bandaged amputated penis. She didn't fall for my joke, perhaps because of the absence of a catheter - or maybe because she knows my weird sense of humor. Later I asked how she would have responded if she thought I really did have my dick removed and she said she'd be fine with it as the little fellow is of no use to her due to ED.

Would I seriously consider a penectomy? I doubt it but admit is has some vague appeal, especially having a clit instead of a semi useless dick.