New here; My introduction.

[photoglenn (imported)]

I am a gay male, 73 years old, married to a man for over 10 years. I am Caucasian, Democrat, spiritual but no religious preference.

I was born male but earlier this year became a eunuch due to medical reasons.

I am having difficulty adjusting to being castrated.

I very much miss having testicles.

I looked on the internet for any possible Eunuch Anonymous support group but found none.

If anyone can direct me to a suitable place on this web site where I can view comments by people who became a eunuch due to no fault or desire of their own I would appreciate this.

A little more info; my urologist prescribed Androgel which I have been using.

I find that this does not increase my interest in sex or sexual abilities.

I feel like I am in a dungeon of being useless, hopeless, with little to no hope of regaining any sexual functioning.

Although I know the equipment does work because sometimes in the middle of the night I will wake up with a very stiff erection.

I take advantage of this and manage to stroke to climax and ejaculation; however the experience still leaves me wanting and unfulfilled.

It just is not the same with no balls flopping in my groin.

Feel free to communicate by email: photoglenn@gmail.com

My private email account.

photoglenn.

[TopManFL (imported)]

Hey,

Welcome home. You are in the right place. You didn't say why you were castrated. Since you were put on Androgel, I assume it was not prostate cancer.

So, other than this forum, I don't know where to direct you for a discussion about why your scrotum is empty.

There are so many reasons this group is so strong. People here due to being trans either being MTE (Male to Eunuch) or MTF (Male to Female), medical reasons, desiring a decrease in libido.

Nonetheless, the reason we are all here isn't as important as the bonds we form while here.

So, you are very much a part of this group. Once we have you, we won't let you fall. Use us for triumphs or the worst day you have. We can take it. Sometimes we can only listen, sometimes someone might have a similar experience.

TD

[catoboros (imported)]

Welcome, photoglenn.

Many males who have been castrated or otherwise have hypogonadism have to try several different testosterone formulations until they find one that works for them. One friend complained about the sticky mess of gels; they can also be unreliable as to dosage. There are also patches and injectable formulations including testosterone cypionate (weekly?) and testosterone undecanoate (10-14 weekly, some even need 6 weekly). I am on the latter. Individual needs vary greatly. If you were low-T or no-T for a while, it can take some time for your mood to recover when you are back on T. Please report your symptoms to your physicians and see if other testosterone formulations might be indicated.

Anyone on testosterone should have a regular whole blood count to monitor their haemocrit and detect secondary polycythemia (excessive haemocrit) which raises cardiovascular risk.

If you miss the physical feeling of testicles, silicone prosthetics are available, although these have their own risks. Harmed body image through loss of a body part may also harm enjoyment of life including sexuality. On the other hand, we have at least three recent members who are involuntary eunuchs and discovered that they very much liked being a eunuch. Individual response varies greatly.

The good news is that you are getting nocturnal erections. This likely means that your erectile function is in good working order.

[Losethem (imported)]

I had it done voluntarily, so just want to be up front about that.

There are many reasons why you could be experiencing these symptoms. It's been just under a year since this happened to yourself. Have you had any lab work done after the surgery. Often a man will have quite a different level of testosterone in his body using the synthetic stuff (IE androgel, shots, etc.) than he had when he still had his testicles.

The body image issue may be important in your case. You've said you've had difficulty since the surgery adjusting to your new normal, but that in the middle of the night you're sometimes waking up with erections and able to use them to enjoy your body to orgasm. This leads me to believe this could be a non-organic issue - IE perhaps speaking with a therapist, and including your partner in that discussion, may be a possible solution. I'm in no way saying you've got any deficiencies there, just that sometimes getting this stuff off your chest with a disinterested third-party, can be helpful.

Another thought is this... have you experienced any depression symptoms, and if so, have you been given any medication for them? I only ask because there are many medications used to treat that which can also diminish sexual enjoyment and interest.

I really do hope you're able to find a solution. The people here are generally welcoming and will treat your respectfully with regards to your concerns and feelings.

Welcome to the site. please feel free to ask us any questions that are on your mind.

--LT

[JessicaH (imported)]

Sometimes the replacement level is way below what you had before. Encourage your Dr. To get you to the high end of normal range. Best of luck!

[cutnbulls2ox (imported)]

Hi photoglenn,

You came to the right website. There are lots of men and eunuchs on this site who got castrated for medical reasons or who have all kinds of ball problems. This website has past forums and non fiction articles about testosterone and artificial testosterone, castration related problems and solutions, and many different things that you will find useful. Lots of the men and eunuchs on here desire or voluntarily got themselves castrated. But many medically necessary castrated men also find the immense information on this website very valuable, especially the information on all kinds of artificial testosterone and other medications to help men remain masculine, virile, and keep a sex drive and enjoyment after castration.

You need to post at least 5 times on here before your private messaging becomes active to allow people to private message you on this website and for you to answer them. I d suggest you post a few more times to reach your 5 posts on here. Then men and eunuchs can anonimously message you on here, using their user names on here to private message you on this website.

You could post to tell us what medical problem caused you to get castrated ? And what things are causing you the most problems now ? Did your dr offer you artificial testicle implants to fill your scrotum to look and feel like you still have balls ? How have you and your man handled your necessary castration so far ?

As you can see on here reading past posts, some of us are way more into our balls and sex than others are. You are welcome here as a ball, masculinity, and sex loving eunuch.

[Begoneboy (imported)]

Photoglenn welcome aboard. This is exactly the place you are looking for to find honest support. We don't care if you are a democrat, libertarian, socialist, gay, straight, young, old or anything else. Welcome to perhaps the most complete source of eunuch information and support archive found on the planet.

[mattman59 (imported)]

As a voluntary eunuch I need and want to be more sympathetic and understanding toward involuntary eunuchs. So Photoglenn by all means welcome and please feel right at home. We'll be more than happy to answer any questions you have.

[photoglenn (imported)]

No, thankfully it was not cancer.

After my second epididymo-orchitis, very painful, and successfully treated with antibiotics, 2 weeks each time, once the pain subsided the second time my balls shrank to about half their original size and became hard and numb. When squeezed there was no pain or sensation.

The urologist ordered an ultrasound. When he got the results the analysis was that there was no blood flowing through my testicles.

His recommendation was to have them removed. Since they were useless I said OK.

Under general anesthetic he removed them out of the scrotum. I learned later that there are 2 methods of removal, through scrotum and through inguinal canal.

I asked him afterwards, why not through the inguinal canal; his response was that this method was used when cancer was present and it is more complicated and risky.

Following the pathology analysis there were no tumors, no cancer, and the end analysis was necrotizing testicuclar vascularitis; a very rare thing. After two episodes of epididyo-orchitis my balls just died a slow death.

Now I suppose for a younger person this would be a catastrophic disaster. For me, being already over the hill as far as aging decling in testosterone and no real need for a libido or sexual performance, or in search of a partner, since i am happily married, this was not the end of the world.

Even so, after almost a year, I am very much missing that part of me that went along for the ride over the past 72 years.

I seem to have developed a sort of Post Castration Emotional Trauma. While I have no practical need for balls, I just plain miss them.

And Santa did not bring me a new pair either. I see that there are many types of interest in this group. More than likely my needs might be served better by seeking out psychiatric counseling, which I am not willing to do. I do not like to communicate verbally face to face with anyone about this

Even my husband and I do not discuss it. I know there is no going back but am struggling to go forward. I dwell on my loss almost constantly.

Now, I will admit there are at least 3 advantages to being castrated:

1. No more pain

2. Never come down with the painful epididyo-orchitis again

3. No risk of testicle cancer.

The Androgel seems to be having little to no results as far as libido and performance are concerned.

I suppose it will help prevent any of the other negative side effects of having NO testosterone.

Even BEFORE the surgery my testosterone level was a mere 45ngl.

Since being on Androgel it has risen to a respectable 105

I happen to have a testosterone lab report from a few years back when it was 230 ngl.

So, there you have it.

Being much older probably than many or most of the other members of this group, perhaps my past, present experiences might be of some value to someone.

In any case, that is an update.

My surgeon never mentioned prosthetic testicle replacement.

I have researched that since and learned that this is best done before the scrotum is closed and stitched.

Later implants carry risk of infection.

Besides which I have no desire at all to go through the scrotum pain again.

So faux testicles are out of the question.

I suppose decreasing or stopping the Androgel would not be a good idea.

I just wonder if it is giving me some kind of negative mental consequence.

Just partly edging me up to an almost libido with no real impact.

[photoglenn (imported)]

Thank You catoboros. I am adding your input to my list of things to do.