Hello!

[lesleygf (imported)]

Hi everyone, I'm Lesley.

I have lurked for a long time but now feel like I should give my own backstory and maybe contribute something. Ever since I was little I knew I didn't fit into the gender spectrum, I couldn't identify or bond with other males and being feminine felt far more natural to me. This led to a lot of unhappiness growing up, feeling like I had to supress how I really felt and to conform to male gender stereotypes. This continued to around 4 years ago when I knew something had to change, this has led to a lot of experimenting with my gender and seeing where I fit and since then I've come to the conclusion that I am infact genderfluid. There are parts of being male that I do enjoy, my hated towards this has obviously come from being forced to conform. Since I've dropped the pretence I now know that I am somewhere down the middle. I like my feminine appearance but I have no issues with my male body from the neck down.

A couple of years ago I started to see a gender therapist about these feelings maintaining that I have no interest going on estrogen and want castration as I have no interest in having a sex drive, but would try chemical castration before making a final decision. These requests have been denied and my therapist has said in not so many words that if I identified as female and went on HRT then she would be able to do the referral for an orchiectomy, so I'm in a situation whereby I lie and take estrogen to get what I desire or I continue to tell it like it is and not be forced into a box I don't want to go into. At this point I'm not really sure what to do and how to go forward.

[Frida G Cavic (imported)]

hi and welcome

[lesleygf (imported)]

hi and welcome

Thank you

[sparkey49 (imported)]

Welcome! Glad you are opening up and hope you find help here it is a great group!

[BrianSanDiego (imported)]

Hello Lesley

Thanks for sharing your story! I understand the frustration with your professional insisting you fit in the binary model. I also do not fit and will be limited to doctors that will proceed with informed consent rather than referrals from other professionals when im ready for surgery.

Nonbinary resouces are becoming more available and I'd suggest you start researching that and find another specialist that will embrace who you are, not who they want you to be.

Brian