Coming Out

[Qunuch81 (imported)]

The idea that it's okay for a guy to be gay in the military as long as he "doesn't act on it" is just as bad as saying there shouldn't be gays in the military. Actually, in some ways it's worse because the gay guy feels like he's supposed to be grateful that the mere fact of his sexuality is being tolerated, so any hurt or anger he may feel about his behavior being unduly policed ends up seeming selfish or unreasonable to him. This becomes yet another reason for gay men to feel shame. It's the Catholic approach to homosexuality, and it's damn poisonous.

[cutnbulls2ox (imported)]

I agree completely. Every man should be able to enjoy his sexuality freely and equally. Now the U.S. military does allow openly gay service members, back then it didn t.

In my friend s case, saying you cannot lie about your sexuality but if you told the truth you should be prosecuted and kicked out made no sense. If asked, which all of us were openly asked as part of enlisting, you are supposed to always tell the truth ? And then get rejected by the military or later get dishonorably discharged for telling the truth whenever asked in the future, even if you never had any sex with another man.

Just telling the truth about being gay was enough to get prosecuted and kicked out. No sexual activity was required to get kicked out. No evidence was required to get kicked out. Just admitting you were gay was enough to get banned from entering the military or dishonorablly discharged if you were already in the military back then. So, my friend s excuses went in an endless circle with no option for any gay man except to lie or get kicked out. He never could get past that pointless circle of lie or get kicked out. He just said, rules are rules, orders are orders. His way to avoid any moral responsibility for prosecuting men solely for what they are, even if they never had any gay sex at all.

My point in this true life story is to be very careful who you come out to. Your best friend might have some convoluted reasoning that you d never expect, that would cause him to turn on you if you come out to them. Obviously, I never did come out to that close friend or he d have busted my ass for it and sent the NCIS after me. Be careful who you give any power over yourself to, they might surprise and disappoint you more than you can imagine. You can t anticipate what ideas and reasoning even your best friends might suddenly surprise you with.

[cutnbulls2ox (imported)]

Technically, some religions are so backward that any sex at all that is not possibly creating a baby is sin ! So unless conception might occur, they think sex for any reason except baby making is sinful, straight, bi, or gay sex.

[Rafaella (imported)]

Compared to a year ago when I was cut I'm completely comfortable about my castration and have no problem coming out to people about it, in some cases I'd even say I flaunt it. Back Nov 2017 it was a different story. The day after I'd been nutted I told my then girlfriend about it, what followed was pretty excrutiating, she told me she saw no future in dating a guy with no baby makers and doubted I'd be able to get it up anyway. Another date went wrong when she got me hard but when she found my empty scrotum, it was OMG I can't make out with a eunuch. It was hard to take back then and I kept quiet about my sexual status for months afterwards. Later when I met a woman who appreciates and admires eunuchs I stopped being uptight about it. Nowadays I have no problem with my castration, I don't mind if someone wants to ask about it or in some cases take a look. About a month ago in the gym showers I saw a guy trying to take a look without being obvious. I told him he could check me intimately if he wanted to, he lifted my cock and felt the area where my balls and sac used to be. He told me my nutless crotch was incredibly hot. I feel good that I could turn someone on like that, I responded by giving his testicles a gentle squeeze and suggesting he may want to consider it for himself one day. At this point he was rock hard and leaking pre cum. Unfortunately a load of guys arrived in the locker room so he covered up, I didn't though and rarely do. I guess what I'm trying to say is that in my experience if you are happy with your castration or at least adjusted it's a lot easier to come out about it.

[Brycenosak (imported)]

Was the same for me, Rafaella. I felt for the last 15 or so years, post castration, that I was a mutilated and therefore undesirable and unattractive male. Irreversibly damaged. Was not until I found the EA and joined in that I began to feel that I am ok to look at. I now like my look. Its a big turn to be told that I'm hot! Being proud of who you are is very empowering

[Rafaella (imported)]

Good for you, there's nothing to be ashamed of in being a eunuch. As I have found recently there are guys and women too who find castrated males very desirable, I've been told several times that nutless guys are a bigger turn on than those with balls. I've also been told the clean cut look, scrotum removed and pubes shaved off is super hot. I admire voluntary eunuchs for being themselves and getting cut and I admire those eunuchs that didn't choose castration but adapted so well afterwards and gave me the benefit of their experience here on EA.

[JessicaH (imported)]

“Never forget what you are, the rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor and it can never be used to hurt you.”

-Tyrion Lannister