Shamelessly stolen jokes

[Dave (imported)]

There is a Bulwar Lytton website devoted to bad writing: http://www.bulwer-lytton.com

The opening line of his novel:

“It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents — except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness.”

— Edward George Buller-Lytton in his novel "Paul Clifford" (1830)

Snoopy is trying to write the Great American Dog Novel ...

[Dave (imported)]

Q: What is Charles Dickens’s favorite spice?

A: The best of thymes, (“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times”)

[Dave (imported)]

I'll check it out. The calf liver is optional? ; )

Calves liver is always an option for family dinner

[rogerwpbfl (imported)]

Calves liver is always an option for family dinner

Maybe not when I'm finished with it lol

[rogerwpbfl (imported)]

Maybe not when I'm finished with it lol

Sorry for the visual.

[Dave (imported)]

Sorry for the visual.

No offense taken...

Find a library and read the book. You'll very quickly understand.

[rogerwpbfl (imported)]

No offense taken...

Find a library and read the book. You'll very quickly understand.

Bought it on my phone. Ima start reading it at work, should be interesting.

[Dave (imported)]

Q: What’s Shakespeare’s favorite movie?

A: Avatar, (“O, wonder! / How many goodly creatures are there here! / How beauteous mankind is! O brave new world, / That has such people in’t!”)

[Dave (imported)]

Q. What was Shakespeare’s favourite household chore?

A. Laundry, (“Out, damned spot! Out, I say.”)

[Paolo]

We hear that line at the MOM quite often, but it's referring to the Mothership's cat!