Why?

[DerKastrierte (imported)]

Interesting question! The funny thing is, I never asked myself. During puberty I found out I am gay and never asked why and while sexual sensations awoke I always felt I wanna get castrated. It started as kind of an omnipresent sexual phantasy which I always tried to deny. But I never asked why. In 30 years of dreaming of becoming an Eunuch I just were afraid I couldn' t like the side effects but I never was questioning the reasons. As I know many people went through similar processes and also I found out meanwhile that I only will know how the life of an Eunuch is, when my balls are gone. As I consider this as my destination, my balls will go. Why? Because it is my wish!

[Nonads_85 (imported)]

Not trying to be facetious, but if you find it hard to answer the question: Why?

Then maybe you should think about the other obvious question: Why not?

Yes I really am being serious.

[YodaNell (imported)]

I, for myself know exactly why I did it. I did it for religious reasons, but the amputations are just the beginning. Now that it's gone, I have to get my mindset in line as well.

I also wanted to be a boy with a vagina as this picture demonstrates. I'm sure most of you guys have seen this pic before, but THIS is what I wanted to be since I was in primary school.

Disclaimer: This is NOT child porn. I, being a man of God find it a disgrace when adults use kids as sexual objects. But these two photos really appeals to me as it reflects what I wanted to be. I showed these pics to my psychiatrist, and he told me that I'm not crazy...he said I'll be surprised to know how many men told him the same thing.

LINK REMOVED.

So...WHY????

We all have our own reasons but let me be candor and say that a site like Eunuch Archive also inspires a person to go for it. When I first saw pictures of nullified men and read the stories I found myself in a weird place. I understood the stories/reasons why men want to do it, but when I saw the pictures the same question bugged me WHY!!!! Why would men cut their dicks off? It looked weird to see a man without genitals, but I deeply inside me I knew that I also wanted that.

Nullifiying myself was not a quick decision. It took a few years after I saw this website...that's why I said that a site like this can also be an influence in answering your question WHY!

[YodaNell (imported)]

Thank you for removing the link. Truly, I mean it. I also removed the pics from the server. That child was born a way that he did not choose. I never knew that there were boys born with a vagina. I wonder how that happens inside the womb. I just tried to answer the spirit of the question "WHY?". What I mean is this: "WHY did I make myself like that boy, who had no choice in how he was born and accept the way he had no choice in...that is, unnormal". We make ourselves unnormal. That question "why?" can not be answered without really deep thought, motivation and courage. Although there are people that mindlessly cut their balls off (perhaps under the influence of drugs, alcohol and daring by friend, and, the building up of desire from reading other men's stories here on the archive), the "why?" stems from early in one's life; like myself who wanted to look like that boy in the picture.

Also, if one's sex is chosen inside the womb, it makes sense that a person should accept one's sexual identity. So if one wants to alter that identity, the question "why?" is not a trivial one. There must be a lot of motivation to alter natural to unnatural. I also believe that each person's "why?", will be different.

[Saco04072 (imported)]

Hello, I'd like to take a stab at "why", well, in my situation anyway. This certainly doesn't apply to everyone. Few, probably. I'll leave logic alone for now, but I can justify "why". Over the past years my marriage has evolved into a power exchange, Fem-Dom FLR dynamic. We don't do the whips, chains and leather stuff, we tried it but it wasn't for us, I'm not really in to the pain. I'll call it "fem-dem lite". Our sex life has changed by my desires, not hers, into a dynamic where her pleasure is our pleasure. Her orgasms are our orgasms. My role in the bedroom is to please her and I do it eagerly. My wife has gladly taken the bull by the horns and she now enjoys calling the shots, saying where, when and how. She keeps me chaste without orgasm for up to a couple weeks at a time, and I enjoy it that way, I enjoy the denial. The sexual frustration and forced denial is very erotic for me, and she knows it. What woman on the planet wouldn't wouldn't jump at the chance to control her husband's sex life, erections, orgasms - everything!

In our home life we tried a full on FLR, it didn't work. We each have our roles and it takes both of us to keep our marriage successful. I'm the bread winner in my family, my wife is a stay home mom and a homemaker, but I am obedient to her. When she asks for something, I get it. When she wants something fixed, I fix it. I still sit in the recliner/throne at evening TV time, and she sits in a smaller chair right to my left and demands that her back and neck get rubbed. I am the king of the house. She is a queen and I treat her that way, but I obey.

My wife at 52 years old desires sexual pleasure and orgasm less than every week, often getting on two weeks. When she desires to be pleasured, she lets me know. As I mentioned before, she keeps me in chastity a good part of the time. It's consensual and was my idea years ago.

I'd like to have less.... far less sex drive. I want to be in service to my wife to serve her sexual needs, with my needs if any a distant second. I'd like to be able to cuddle, massage, and be near each other without the constant drive to get my hands into her undies and my penis into her vagina. When I'm locked the sex drive soars when not able to release. When I'm unlocked I release myself often, too often, without her knowledge and against the rules.

Given the dynamic that my wife and I share and practice, I can justify castration. It may even be logical. The desire for the denial of sex, I suppose is not logical, it's just how it is now.

[YodaNell (imported)]

You know, ladies and gents, I would have thought that the intense sex drive that men experience would only bother a Christian...maybe because of religious guilt. But, reading through this Archive, I know there are many who are not religious...or, at least, be influenced by religious guilt.

So, I can then maybe come to the conclusion that ALL men (regardless of religion) hate the constant demand that sexuality demands from us. I have heard somewhere (I think it was Johnston & Johnston), that men think 98% of the day about sex. Well then, no wonder that we (or many of us) want to get rid of this demand and being a slave to our genitals and want to get rid of it.

It's a pity our genitals don't fall off (like a gecko) after the second child.

PS. By the way, have any of you, who want to be a nullo, consider donating (or selling) their penis to South African men who lost their penises due to cancer or whatever? Now that we are able to transplant a penis, I'm sure, instead of YOU paying for nullification in the East, sell your penis to these men who never wanted to lose their penis. The client would pay for the operation and perhaps you have enough change left. At first, my life partner, who is gay, thought this whole deal (pretty much like me at first) weird, but now he is seriously considering donating (well....selling) his penis to a needy man. He seems to want a mangina.