science puns - older than Galileo

[Dave (imported)]

Now these are old, old, old -

Of course, so is the universe . . .

1. Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi

2. 2000 pounds of Chinese Soup = Won ton

3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope

4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond

5. Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram

6. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong

7. 365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer = 1 Lite year

8. 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling

9. Half a large intestine = 1 semicolon

10. 1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz

11. Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower

12. Shortest distance between two jokes = a straight line

13. 2000 mockingbirds = two kilomockingbirds

14. 1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 Fig Newton

15. 1000 ccs of wet socks = 1 literhosen

16. 8 nickels = 2 paradigms

[curious_guy (imported)]

7. 365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer = 1 Lite year

That should be 365.2425.

[Dave (imported)]

That should be 365.2425.

Do you think the drunk who drank every day for a year remembers those few minutes?

[gareth19 (imported)]

That should be 365.2425.

365.2425 works out to be 365 days 5 hours 49 minutes and 12 seconds; the actual length of the tropical year is 365 days 5 hours 48 minutes and 45 seconds. but in 1972 the official world standard of time replaced earth time (sidereal and tropical years) with atomic time. The year is now defined as 290,091,200,500,000,000 [two hundred ninety quadrillion, ninety-one trillion, two hundred billion, five hundred million] oscillations of cesium (or caesium if you prefer) 137.

[Riverwind (imported)]

Time is just relative, when your retired not even the days of the week matter, so its like this friend who works at Lawrence Livermore Lab who ran an experiment on the speed of light to 18 decimal positions, because he could, it was a Tuesday.

Thank you Dave for the chuckle.

River