A Long Time Coming

[wannabegirlagain (imported)]

Hello, my name is Michael. I am 65-years-old and now living a gay life after trying and failing miserably to be straight for a miserable part of my life. [If the truth is to be told, i know that i was born into the wrong body, so i guess i'm actually not really gay either.] Everything was wonderful for me until puberty came crashing into my life. Suddenly, rather than seeing myself as a rather boyish girl, i looked in the mirror and saw this grotesque figure--with hair growing in the oddest places and testicles that seemed to grow huge and ugly overnight--staring back at me. Fortunately--even to this day, my penis remained small and unobtrusive. I could shave the unwanted hair, but the testicles just hung there mocking me. So, at the age of 12, i decided that i had to do everything possible to get rid of that hideous sac between my legs. Of course, the methods i tried back then were unsuccessful. But, by the time i reached my 20's, the idea of being castrated entered my mind and would not go away. I knew that eventually i would have to take that plunge. Late as it may seem, that time has arrived.

My discomfort with my testicles goes well beyond how i look. It has much more to do with the fact that my sexual appetites are--and always have been--totally out of control. My prostate was surgically removed six years ago due to cancer. My hope, at the time, was that my sex drive would diminish. But the opposite seemed to happen: since then, i have been a totally indiscriminate slut, finding as much sex [often risky and dangerous] as possible with as many men [and some women] as possible. The sex is no longer pleasurable. And even worse, there have been no feelings of affection for my partners either. It is just something i feel forced into doing. Two wonderful lovers have left me because of this promiscuity. I have have sought psychological help several times over the years, mostly to no avail. My last doctor finally suggested that castration might be the answer i am looking for. FINALLY! So here i am, seeking as much advice and help as i can get before i go through with this procedure.

So, hopefully, i will soon find a cutter. By the way, i want to be awake and without anesthesia as my hated testicles [and perhaps my penis] are removed finally and forever.

[Losethem (imported)]

So, hopefully, i will soon find a cutter. By the way, i want to be awake and without anesthesia as my hated testicles [and perhaps my penis] are removed finally and forever.

I was with you until this part, now I'm skeptical.

--LT