"The Warden's Daughter" is one of the best stories that I have read in a long time.
You made it all so realistic, with even the minor characters being developed -- the first guy to be 'broken', and also the guards who tie up the prisoner for Claudia. She contains that awful combination of youthful seeming-innocence and EVIL. One can imagine that it might be possible for a young girl to develop in that way if she were a Warden's daughter -- she may have watched her father doing similar things to inmates when she was quite young, so she would come to regard her complete power and what she does with it as 'natural and normal'.
It's good to find a story which gradually builds up tension, and a horrible realization of what is going to happen, plus all the sexual arousal and excitement which is ironically associated with his sexual destruction. So many other stories jump straight into the 'castration scene' almost right from the beginning, and it then just becomes mechanical -- what is really interesting are the characters involved and their responses to what is happening.
Khaled
The Warden's Daughter
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Khaled (imported)
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konobaloo (imported)
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Re: The Warden's Daughter
This certainly looks like the story will be rather involved. I'm sure all the readers are waiting to see what our little antagonist has got cooked up. Please don't keep us in suspense too long. konobaloo
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ivanjeffords (imported)
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Re: The Warden's Daughter
Thanks for the feedback. I also want to thank all the other readers who sent encouraging words directly to my email address. This is really a great group.
I am diligently working on Chapter 2.
--Ivan Jeffords
I am diligently working on Chapter 2.
--Ivan Jeffords
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teez1 (imported)
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Re: The Warden's Daughter
This is comming along nice!
You could keep his mental debate going on for
quite some time, while she continues to try
to motivate him. Hope you keep going with it.
This has a very good flow. Good Job!
You could keep his mental debate going on for
quite some time, while she continues to try
to motivate him. Hope you keep going with it.
This has a very good flow. Good Job!
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ivanjeffords (imported)
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Re: The Warden's Daughter
Thanks for the comments. I only plan to write one more chapter of The Warden's Daughter, as I don't think there is enough psychological steam to propel it farther than that. However, the end of the next chapter (the epilogue) will suggest several spin-off possibilities with the same characters. Depending on how much reader feedback I get, I may pursue those.
Ivan Jeffords
Ivan Jeffords
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dlough1 (imported)
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Re: The Warden's Daughter
I really like your story and for future plots how about these:
she's going to New York for college and she jois a Sorority
where "Girl's Rule" and the whole sorority runs him thru the
gaunlet busting his balls with hands, knees, socks stuffed with
socks and used as slings, etc.
or a sorority where the girls believe in Jungle fever and he
is used and humiliated by the girls and their lovers as a ball-less
cuckold.
she's going to New York for college and she jois a Sorority
where "Girl's Rule" and the whole sorority runs him thru the
gaunlet busting his balls with hands, knees, socks stuffed with
socks and used as slings, etc.
or a sorority where the girls believe in Jungle fever and he
is used and humiliated by the girls and their lovers as a ball-less
cuckold.
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Mac (imported)
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Re: The Warden's Daughter
Re: future plot for The warden's daughter
...
...
She completely removes his genitals making him a total nullo and makes him into her girl servant.dlough1 (imported) wrote: Thu Oct 31, 2002 1:54 pm for future plots how about these: she's going to New York for college and she joins a Sorority where "Girl's Rule" and the whole sorority runs him thru the gaunlet ...