Why Be a Eunuch?

[loveableleopardy (imported)]

Is there any advantage bigger than "being yourself"?

One does not need to justify being oneself as long as it does not harm others.

I understand your point (and I like), but I think that those who do not wish you to undertake such a transformation would argue that you are not being yourself by becoming a Eunuch, that being yourself is to remain exactly who you are, working with what you were born with (and/or that puberty naturally created).

The second point I think is easier for us (Eunuchs and those wanting to be Eunuchs or to make such a change that causes others offence) to try to get across to others, though acknowledging that it will cause others offence can already be argued back that we are causing harm to others, and undue harm, since others will just argue, "why don't you just be yourself and stay the same?"

The causing offence to others thing can of course be reduced if people are able to learn to be less scared about things that they shouldn't be scared about (which is basically just fear of embarrassment); however this seems unlikely to be achieved in any great way. So the best way to reduce the offence would be for others to not know about what will cause the offence, and this may or may not be possible, depending on life scenarios and the actions of yourself and others. Then there is the fact that if you do decide to try to hide your Eunuch frame of mind (and possible physical status), then others may claim that you are not being yourself - or that you are ashamed of yourself and shouldn't have the Eunuch physicality as well as the frame of mind, that if you really knew what you wanted then you would be proud of it and of yourself.

So it can be difficult to win either way.

I really am not sure of what to say to my doctor when I see him in 8 days. I feel like I am going to go into the meeting without any grand plan, and without a gun-ho attitude. I will probably just say whatever feels appropriate at the time, which will most certainly include that I do still wish to give androcur a go. I do not envisage there being any kicking and screaming, and perhaps not even any swearing; I feel like whatever will happen has already been decided and as such I will let fate reveal the answer to me. What I have just felt though, is that I will embark on one thing or the other, depending on the outcome of my consultation. Down the track, this is where "harm others" might come into the equation, in a causing offence through embarrassment and fear sense.

[loveableleopardy (imported)]

So, ADVANTAGES... biggest one for me was that I suddenly quit hating myself, and I was no longer angry at the world, the rage and anger that I feel most of the time were gone! GONE!

Second, I was not a stupid horney moron anymore. I wasted too much time and money just looking to get laid. I NEVER missed my "morning wood" or any other erections that I no longed had, and I was quite happy not to have any erections. I was very happy that I was no longer making a fool of myself for any woman who I might have sex with.

I had feelings again, I could empathize easily, and I understood people. I had feelings before the depo provera, but I never understood the feelings, I just felt the feelings and drifted from one mood to another without really thinking about things. On the depo provera, I UNDERSTOOD my feelings and the feelings of others much better.

I would be lying if I said my depo provera (temporary and reversible) castration was ALL great. There were a few fleeting moments when I was so profoundly LONELY, and I knew that I would have been so grateful for anyone I could talk too. I felt so lonely in bed, I wanted to sleep next to someone, not for any sexual things, just wanted someone, anyone, to be with. Seriously, it was lucky for me that no con artist found me during any of those fleeting moments, I know I would have been very vulnerable at those times.

Finally, I suppose the disadvantage of not being able to have children, but really, IF you are lucky enough to have a woman you want to have children with, then sperm donors are a dime a dozen to get a woman pregnant. So infertility is NOT, in my opinion, a real disadvantage.

Why are men generally more violent than women? Testosterone. That is correct isn't it? Is there any other possible reason?

Having testosterone can indeed result in wasting a great deal of time and money. And time in particular, is very important. First and foremost I am a writer (that is how I view myself), and that is very often what makes me happy. Much of the time that I get back that is wasted because of testosterone can be poured into various book project ideas, and other worthwhile writing in general. I have lost complete motivation for book projects, and perhaps not without coincidence, this has come approximately during the period that I have finally been sexually active. It may take up to 6 months to get back into book writing mode (I imagine that it would take time just to re go over old ideas and perhaps get my head around whatever I was planning), but I am confident that with my testosterone removed that this motivation can be recovered. So why was I able to write books in the past? Well, I think that I could still sometimes focus on such things while I was still working out what was best for me in life. Once I worked this out, that's when I either get what I want (which should not cause offence to others) or I start kicking and screaming

M

aking a fool of myself for any woman who I might have sex with.

Well not in all cases a fool (for me), but yeah, there is that constant hope of having to always desire the sex with her, even if she's said no (I have discussed such things at other times on the EA). I'm reminded of a quote by Mike Skinner, which goes something like; "Girls flirt to value their self worth while guys just hanker for hanky panky to happen." I have often complained about the annoyance of having the male sex drive, and of how much it effects us, but I think that women have it just as bad, but in a different way. They have such a constant worry over whether they are attractive (or are still attractive) that they need this validated by men (and preferably handsome men) basically all the time, perhaps as often as we physically require to get off.

We may wake up with morning wood, but they may wake up with a migraine of insecurity about their attractiveness level to men; both issues may produce about as much negativity in the lives of those who have to deal with them.

I am of course just spitting. I can't categorically say whether that is an accurate portrail of the female side of things. I was born a man.

I think that I understand my feelings pretty well despite the testosterone, but then again I won't have a comparison to make until I have it properly removed for a decent length of time.

I don't believe that I will feel THAT lonely, even if my actions push many people away, including my parents. I think that pets can help, and we can always interact with others online. I know that I would always get excellent companionship on the EA (and that's just one part of the internet); in fact my interactions would become better with others without my testosterone (going back to the time thing, and having a really free mind).

And if it would be true with me as it is with you of understanding others better, than the interactions only improve.

I also wouldn't be as lonely as some because I have lived most of my life as single. So I am probably not as attached to the always having someone by my side thing as some others. I am someone who can go out to a bar on my own, still.

The sperm donor thing is a wonderful point. I was thinking that before starting on Androcur that I should go to a sperm bank and make some deposits of my own. What does anyone else think of this?

[raymar2020 (imported)]

I'll respond here. I grew up for all intents and purposes a eunuch. No visible testicles until I was 16. By then their intrusion into my life was unwelcome. They felt unnatural, and alien, and caused me great emotional stress. Thankfully they soon retreated back into invisibility, and I was left with only the issues of pain, and their lack of function.Over the years many who I was sexually active with were not even aware that I still had them. I was always quite comfortable with my eunuch appearance, and quite content not to have them.

The years passed , and the pain issues multiplied until I was finally able to convince a surgeon that a gay man with dead balls really didn't need them. They were removed in 2008. I only thought I was comfortable prior to that point. Once they really were gone, I found a new peace with myself that I could never have imagined before they were removed. I am totally comfortable being a eunuch, and truly feel that I am now as nature had intended in the beginning.

While being a eunuch is certainly not for everyone, for me it is one of the blessings of life. I am open about my status with most everyone in my life, and have no shame about being "different". I do use HRT, since I do not desire to be a nonsexual being. To some I know that sort of negates the whole eunuch thing, but its about what works for each individual

Raymar

[Peter47-NL (imported)]

The advantages of being a Eunuch seems for me that a deballed body expresses more and corresponds more with a state of mind I'm longing for and already have reached in some way. My desire for a castration is also joined with the desire to be member of a like-minded Eunuch community, not only on the internet but as friends of flesh and blood. I have loved my sex-live, but don't long to have it back, I'm happy that I'm almost complete a-sexual and my way of thinking about love has changed and tends much more to tenderness and affection than to lust and passion.

What keeps me from a castration is the lack of courage to talk about it with my GP, the costs, the chemical castration before the surgical castration, the fear of pain and the healing.

And I wonder, are testicles only producing sperm and testosterone or do they also make something else that I don't know?

[punkypink (imported)]

I understand your point (and I like), but I think that those who do not wish you to undertake such a transformation would argue that you are not being yourself by becoming a Eunuch, that being yourself is to remain exactly who you are, working with what you were born with (and/or that puberty naturally created).

Well being oneself on the inside is what I meant. The outside is just the cover for the book, being true to the contents of that book is what matters. What you want to do with the outside is entirely one's personal choice.

Lower or no sex drive resulting in a clearer mind and being a better person. One who can love another to his full potential; mentally, emotionally and physically.

Interesting post. Having a healthy sex drive for me does not seem to cloud my mind, but then as Cainite pointed out it's subjective, so many some people need a lowered sex drive before the potential of their minds are unlocked. Maybe it's just because I have a female brain...

[eunuch2001 (imported)]

I am totally comfortable being a eunuch, and truly feel that I am now as nature had intended in the beginning.

While being a eunuch is certainly not for everyone, for me it is one of the blessings of life.

Raymar

Thanks Raymar. That's exactly how I feel too and I couldn't have expressed it better.

[feedback (imported)]

Some of us had it forced on us because of medical problems. As it turns out I am a much nicer person without testosterone. I am much calmer, slower to anger, more emotional and just a more caring thoughtful person. After years of experimenting with different levels of replacement I choose to use just enough to keep me healthy but not enough to bring out the old me.

[Peter47-NL (imported)]

The advantages of being a Eunuch seems for me that a deballed body expresses more and corresponds more with a state of mind I'm longing for and already have reached in some way. My desire for a castration is also joined with the desire to be member of a like-minded Eunuch community, not only on the internet but as friends of flesh and blood. I have loved my sex-live, but don't long to have it back, I'm happy that I'm almost complete a-sexual and my way of thinking about love has changed and tends much more to tenderness and affection than to lust and passion.

What keeps me from a castration is the lack of courage to talk about it with my GP, the costs, the chemical castration before the surgical castration, the fear of pain and the healing.

And I wonder, are testicles only producing sperm and testosterone or do they also make something else that I don't know?

I considered that if a lack of courage to talk about castration with my GP keeps me from a castration I must think about what I like to say to my GP about the subject and write it down on paper. Before writing down my thoughts and questions I took an encyclopedia and looked for castration which derives from the Latin word castratio which on its turn originates from the Latin word castus = pure. This is exactly how I feel about the subject: a castration is in its highest goal a purification.

[devi (imported)]

There aren't many reasons for being a eunuch. When speaking Spanish women half my age will tell me, "no me tuteas, este jovencito muchachito!" (Don't insult me by talking like you're as old as me, little kid. Something like that.) So at fifty-three I still pretty much speak in the formal. You can impress them by out-sopranoing them though but then again as old as I am I can't do that on most days anymore. My balls never completely matured and for this reason I was very happy to be rid of them at last (rather than keeping them inside my pelvis) and to become at least "formally" a eunuch at last some years ago. And I have loved this ever since. So for me becoming a full eunuch was the best thing. My only regret was that I had never done this earlier because of all those physicians that had scoffed at me from my adolescence until I was finally able to locate someone.

[loveableleopardy (imported)]

Castus = pure

I like!

I very much agree with the purification idea...for me. Like Raymar said, it is not for everyone.