Just for Dave - Facets Guide to some of the WORST movies

[fhunter]

Aren't you amazed at the change in the pacing and cutting of movies over the years?

If it were made today, 2001 would be faster and shorter.

And contain sounds in space, and all possible violations of the laws of physics.

On topic - it seems that attention span gets shorter and shorter and so the pacing of the films changes. :p

[Dave (imported)]

And contain sounds in space, and all possible violations of the laws of physics.

On topic - it seems that attention span gets shorter and shorter and so the pacing of the films changes. :p

A good friend who never watched TV or movies because of his religion once asked me why if they finally invented laser swords and particle beam weapons didn't they create something that made them more accurate. Like the western movies of the fifties, the good and bad guys are notoriously bad shots.

There really isn't an answer to that other than "it makes the plot work" ...

So yes, the laws of physics get violated on a regular basis. A reporter once asked Alfred Hitchcock why (in one of his movies) didn't the girl just run away and call the police and Hitchcock in his own inimitable way merely answered "If she did, there wouldn't be a movie."

BTW - I think television and television commercials are responsible for the swiftness of cuts and quickening of plots. I'm not sure that is good or bad or both good AND bad.

And one last word: CALIGULA the movie is one seriously awful movie even though it has one neato castration scene where one of the guards gets his dick cut off and thrown to a dog. I mean that any movie where the king shoves his fist into the anus of a legionnaire on camera gets minus points in my book. That falls under the idea of "things that really make me want to leave the theater screaming and puking."

[Paolo]

I loved "Caligula"!

2001 and 2010 were so dead boring and sooooo very long. I hated them.

[Slammr (imported)]

I loved "Caligula"!

2001 and 2010 were so dead boring and sooooo very long. I hated them.

I'll admit that Caligula was a terrible movie, but I'm with Paolo on this one: I loved it. 2001 was so hyped at the time that few would admit how boring and nonsensical it was. Hal should have killed all those assholes. He was the only interesting character in the movie.

[erikboy (imported)]

And contain sounds in space, and all possible violations of the laws of physics.

On topic - it seems that attention span gets shorter and shorter and so the pacing of the films changes. :p

Theoretically there should be some physical limit for attention span.

But, to remind good old days on should watch "Stalker" by Andrey Tarkovskiy.

It is not a film that you could watch without understanding what about actors are talking.

Warning!!! Despite this is a sci-fi movie, there is absolutely no special effects!

[Dave (imported)]

I didn't see 2001 in the theater. I only saw it on videotape and I did wonder what the fuss was all about. It was too long.

I only saw - Plan 9 From Outer Space - on TV and I just marvelled at how bad it was and how amatuer it was. It was so obviously some guy's personal wet dream and it was BAD.

I thought the end of CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND sucked.

Let me say that again - sucked, sucked, sucked. There were sci fi movies out there with much better "awe" inspiring endings. The end isn't even an iconic image.

If you want to see iconic images, go off and watch Kurasawa's RAN... That's a movie with some thought to the images matching the story and the themes. BTW - it's pronounce Rahn like yawn and it means Chaos.

55 days at Peking with Charlton Heston and Ava Gardner has iconic images of a very historical nature and a great story.

Recently, THE LAST SAMURAI (and don't go off into Tom Cruise hate land) has the themes and story and writing and visuals that tell an epic tale of one man against the backdrop of a country in change. Excellent film.

[Riverwind (imported)]

Stop Dave,

I am afraid Dave,

Stop Dave,

Would you like to hear a song Dave,

Dasie, Dasie,...................

Its getting dark Dave,............

.................................................. ..............

I am with Paolo, I loved Caligula the X rated movie

Truly it was a classic.

Plan 9 From Outer Space was a movie I turned off after 20 minutes, I had seen enough and it was now wasting my time.

CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND, the whole movie sucked, however it is shown every night at the KOA camp ground at Devils Tower, Wy. where the film was made. EVERY NIGHT.

THE LAST SAMURAI, that was a good movie, not a great movie but not a bad movie either.

River

[Dave (imported)]

huh?

what was that?

[StefanIsMe (imported)]

oh, excellent list.

Paolo, you would fit like a glove with me and my friend Barry; our idea of a great weekend at the cabin is to watch the most horrible, worst-drected and -acted films and tv-shows we can find.

When drunk and high (weed only, here), these movies are wonderful fun. Still, we never watch more than one really bad Bollywood film per weekend; those things are darn near un-watchable.

Some of our faves;

- Public Television east-indian shows, in native language. We can't understand a word, but they can be fun.

- Capricorn One, a movie from the 80's (I think). Hopeless acting, sucky ending.

- Soap, the tv show from the 70's. Amazingly ahead of its time, good acting, but soooo dated. Worth a giggle every time.

- Who's the Boss, a UBER-terrible tv show from the 80's with Tony Danza. Only redeeming feature is his son, and his girlfriends mother, who also starred in Soap.

- Absolutely any Rob Schneider film. This guy is hopeless; watching him act is like watching a dog drink water... a sloppy, slobbery mess. However, if stoned enough, we have a ball making fun of him in every scene (doesn't matter which movie, they all suck).

[Dave (imported)]

...

- Soap, the tv show from the 70's. Amazingly ahead of its time, good acting, but soooo dated. Worth a giggle every time.

...

Do you remember Gordon Jump's line "I'm the Pieff of Cholice" ??

It's burnt into my mind...