so my story starts when i was about 8 years old, so... if you have a moment to read for a lil while i think that my story could interest you or anyone else who might be into things i call... sinful.It all seemed to have started at the age of 8, i am not for sure what had triggered it, but i was on the couch with my sister and my mom watching gilligans island
when i decided i had to go pee, so i went to the bathroom, while i was in there i was looking through some cabinets and drawers, looking for what? i really could not tell u.. i found an item called fix-o-dent, im sure most people know what it is used for, but i didnt, all i know is at that moment when i found that item my sexual frustration and weird desires came about.I was alone in the bathroom with a tube of fix-o-dent when i decided to pull down my shorts and insert some of this thick paste into my uretha opening of my penis, it was a strange yet good curious feeling when i squeezed the product down into my penis. I had enjoyed the feeling of it coming back up through my uretha hole, infact i did it multiple times during commercials while watching tv..
From that point on at the age of 8 i had done little to minor things to my penis, i had used fix-o-dent as well as elmers glue to squeeze down my uretha once again, i remember getting a hard-on but never having an orgasm or even jacking off..
upon hitting puberty is when it went from minor things to moderate play, at the age of 14 i had hit puberty and started to be able to get an orgasm .
i still had a fascination of putting things down into my uretha, i have used fix-o-dent elmers glue and now i had tried the liquid metal mercury which i had stolen from science class in school, it had felt so good to squeeze that stuff down my uretha tube, and felt even better when i had cum and the mercury shot up with my load. i had done that multiple times, i them started to experiment with maggots, i still have a fascination with the thought of maggots eating away at my penis even today.. i would let the maggots crawl down my uretha tube until i had gotten my orgasm, at that point they would shoot up with my load in a great feeling i must say.. WOW..
When i was 16 i started experimenting with chemicals and knife play... with the chemicals i would use everything for hairspray to gum off, which is liquid nitrogen. i would basically freeze part of my penis until the pain is too great, at one time while i was in my room i had sprayed the head of my penis until it was solid white, wow a great build up of excitement came until it started to thaw out.. at one point the pain was so great i had to re freeze it to make it go away
wow you would think i would have learned my lesson from that but up to this day i still play with liquid nitrogen, dry ice, dust-off and what not.. The knife play is a time in my life that basically started my whole cock cutting career up to this date... when i was 16 i used to pretend to cut my penis off, i would hold a sharp knife against my penis and press it hard against my penis until the pain was to great.. just enough so i could build up my sexual frustration for an orgasm.. i have also tried heat, as far as a lighter goes i still have a scar of my glans from a lighter i held to my penis for about 30 seconds... it had turned my skin charred white and left a good scar after healing... the pain was intense but i had tied a shoestring around my penis to make it numb... im surprised my penis still works after tying up up as much as i do... i still do it today..I got married and had a kid when i was 18, found a nice girl and had opened up to her about some of the things that i do to myself... not all though.. i have never really told anyone what all i have done...except you.
a cpl years after having the kid i had gone deeper into the abuse of my penis, realizing that its wrong and there cant be anyone else out there that does this to themselves, there just cant be! I felt as though i had something wrong with me, but i continued to do it anyway, i couldnt stop.. I wanted to do more to myself inject liquid into my penis, numb it with ambsol and freeze it again.. so i had obtained a injection needle and mixed up some tooth numbing medicine called ambsol and mixed it with warm water and injected my penis with it.. it felt good to feel the stinging of the injection, i had numbed my penis to the point of where i felt comfortable of performing what i was about to doo... i wanted to freeze it and burn it again... No!! No i didnt i wanted to cut my penis this time, i wanted a meatotomy And i was ready to do it... this was a rather easy operation to do.. i had numbed my penis so i grabbed a new pair of wirecutters and basically just clipped the section of skin from the head to the shaft of the penis, and with one quick pop i knew i had broken through to new excitements in my cock abuse career... it bleed pretty bad but with little to no pain it had healed within a cpl weeks, a nice clean cut..
the next cpl years i had continued to abuse my cock, with ice fire, numbing medicines, and at one point i managed to get my hands on some lidocaine and epinephrine a great combination of numbing medicines.. wow i still get hard thinking about what i had done..
I obtained another needle and injected myself first with the lidocaine, i picked a spot on my penis where i knew there were major nerves so i injected myself at the base and the head area.. within seconds i could no longer feel my penis, not even the slightest, its as if it had been detached!! i wanted to make sure that it was numb so i grabbed a knife and stuck the sharp point into my penis with pressure... i heard a pop... the sound of the knife breaking the skin.. so i stopped and then began the epinephrine injection... this drug constricts blood vessels and when i had injected the drug into my penis it had pushes all the blood out and shrunk it to a small lifeless piece of flesh.. it was so pale looking and so small, i could not get an erection but i tell u that for me is the most exciting moment of my abuse to my cock... it had lasted for about 30 mins... im lucky to be alive though cause i had read that people could doe from injecting themselves with that stuff but i didnt care... i didnt orgasm or cum, but the excitement from being so small and numb was superb... i knew there was little to no blood in my penis so i wanted to split my head my glans... i did this with a razor and cut a good portion in half until i hit my two tube that fill up with blood to get hard... i could feel the different texture of the corpora cavernosa.. but i went just a little further and began to cut into them a little as well... i got scared and backed off at that point.. not wanting to totally destroy my penis.. i wrapped it in a bandage and went and took a nap.. was way tired and worn out after that incident.. when i woke i was aware that the bandage had become really soaked in blood so i had to take a look at what i had done.. upon unwrapping i notice that the majority of the blood was coming from the area where i cut into the corpora cavernosa... i pulled my head apart a little and blood stared to squirt in rhythmic fashion...
the pumping of my heart... i had hit an artery i believe... i applied a massive amount of pressure and wrapped it in bandages for the next 7 days and lucky!! i manage to stop all the bleeding and scar tissue was forming over the artery.. whew!! At that point i stayed away from cutting and abuse for a cpl months...I once again had an urge to play with a pair of wire cutters.. so i wanted to have a partial sub incision... i had seen it before on the internet and thought it would be awesome for more play... this was a heavy bleeder once again... as i had clipped from my meatotomy down the shaft of my penis i manage to get a cpl inches cut and hit numerous veins while doing so... but the view of seeing my penis open up was almost as good as an orgasm.. after a cpl more weeks of healing it was healed and so i had one... a partial subincision.. a few more months had gone by and now i wanted to play with more maggots... i found a bunch of them.. from a decaying animal so i went into the bathroom, tied off my penis with clear electrical tape... wrapped it several time very tightly ... i made a tube that would hold my penis and the maggots so i could watch them digging and eating into my skin... the maggots have a hard time trying to eat the skin of my outer penis, but with the sub incision and the uretha now open... the skin lining is so thin the maggots were able to break it and start eating away at my penis... wow what a sight!! i let them play and eat away at it for about 20 mins... i had built up enough frustration that i need to cum... i removed all maggots including the ones digging into the thin skin lining of the uretha... and did my thing... my most recent abuse to my penis is my desire to split my penis in half... or at least put a nice hole though the middle so i could put my finger though it... i have been working at it, and am still in the process of doing that today...
So that is my story... maybe not all of it but most of it... from age 8 to today i have abused my penis and had circulation cut off from it for hours!! and it still works... I had always thought that it was sinful and bad to do this to myself and that no one else has ever done that... until i looked on the net and had viewed others post on this site... I wanted to tell people what i have done and that i cant stop... i dont think its bad now just a part of me that maybe i want removed from my body?? i dont know but i would like to hear other peoples opinions on my story if you have a moment...