There's Always The Weather

[Riverwind (imported)]

Joe Soucheray: Finally, someone will tell us when 35 below is too cold By Joe Soucheray

Updated: 12/06/2011 10:07:27 PM CST

In our neck of the woods, and at a few National Weather Service offices on the East Coast, EXTREME COLD warnings will be issued this year instead of wind-chill warnings. There is a technical reason for making the switch, most principally because a wind-chill warning was not issued at a temperature of 35 below if there was no wind.

Now, on the hopefully rare occasions when it drops to 35 below and there is no wind, we will still be getting a warning, not a wind-chill warning, but an EXTREME COLD warning.

For years, I resisted the wind-chill warnings. It was an admonishment to understand what the temperature might feel like in the wind, so that wind-chill warnings were thrown around out there all over the temperature map. Why, as we experienced one of the balmiest autumns in recent memory, the meteorologists were still itching to come up with wind-chill reports at even 20 degrees or so. No, they weren't warnings, but we were to be put in our place that 20 degrees feels colder if the old wind is howling down from Lake of the Woods.

A cynical person might wonder why anybody needs to be told anything at 35 below. At 35 below, wind or no wind, your eyelids freeze shut, your car won't start and you curse your predecessors for settling here in the first place. But I believe we have become a collection of people who need warnings. They shake us out of our complacency. They give us something to worry about, from swine flu to nuclear fallout to ozone depletion

Advertisement

to carbon footprints. Warnings wake us up. Warnings say to us: "Hey, listen up! You can't fly back to Minnesota from Orlando wearing Bermuda shorts and Mickey Mouse ears. You'll freeze to death!" EXTREME COLD might get through to some. But I don't think so. Having just witnessed actual adults wearing Mickey Mouse ears and shorts, I believe the National Weather Service needs to come up with warnings that alert even the most obtuse, those who believe that being kept informed means reading the latest news about Lady Gaga and the Kardashian herd.

EXTREME COLD warnings are not alarming enough at 35 below. I would go with something like a death warning:

"IF YOU GO OUTSIDE TOMORROW WITHOUT A HAT YOU WILL DIE!"

Temperatures between zero and 35 below are nothing to sneeze at, either. I would use the death warning liberally. There are just too many people wandering around in flip-flops and Green Bay Packer jerseys. Hit them with the death warning.

If it's only zero, but the wind is roaring, I would go with: "WARNING! IT IS COLDER THAN A BRASS TOILET SEAT IN AN OUTHOUSE."

We have to come up with warnings that will cause people to realize that they don't have to care about what they look like in public. As a native Minnesotan, I can clearly remember the day when we knew how to bundle up. We were champions. We were known for our bundling. It didn't make any difference what we looked like. I mean, long before wind-chill warnings and now EXTREME COLD, we knew how to look like miners trudging to work in the depths of a Siberian winter.

Get a stocking cap and some leather chopper mittens and a coat with a hood on it. Wear boots. Wrap a scarf around your face. There is no app for your smartphone that is going to make it warmer.

April will make it warmer. And April is a long way off. If you ignored wind-chill warnings, I'm not sure that EXTREME COLD will get through to you. You need to hear:

"IF YOU GO OUTSIDE TOMORROW WITHOUT A HAT YOU WILL DIE!''

And let the kids wear the Mickey Mouse ears on the airplane, not you.

Joe Soucheray can be reached at jsoucheray@pioneerpress.com or 651-228-5474. Soucheray is heard from 3 to 6 p.m. weekdays on 1500ESPN.

Because before when it was 35 below we just did not know it was that cold.

River

[Dave (imported)]

It snowed somewhere around me.

There might be a half an inch of snow out there but since it's going up to 42 F tomorrow. it will melt even if it is an inch.

Maybe next week I'll get snow tires put on my car.

[twaddler (imported)]

If it's going to be this cold here (30 degrees F), it might as well be snowy as heck. More snow!!

[fhunter]

Still no snow on the ground here... And even some remains of greenish grass...

It is still around 0C here.

I wonder, what the weather would be for the new year?

[moi621 (imported)]

Still no snow on the ground here... And even some remains of greenish grass...

It is still around 0C here.

I wonder, what the weather would be for the new year?

fhunter, have you forgotten Mother Russia requires an invasion to bring the blessings of a earlier Winter.

Shirt in the day, jacket at night. Sometimes a heavy jacket as the more comfortable ocean influenced air gets exchanged for that colder, zero humidity, heat leeching desert stuff. Now and then they suddenly promise a rainstorm in a day or five only to "change their minds".

The year of the great drought relief, the rainy season started after New Years. Just consistent, light to moderate rain filled those reservoirs and snow packs (stored water) in a couple of months. Hardly the whole season.

Garlic is establishing well and onions are just beginning. The loquat continues to flower and bear small fruits.

Please send rain.

Moi

[moi621 (imported)]

Rain is promised 1AM Monday thru Tuesday, maybe clearing Wednesday.

With all respect for the "wet's" influence in Southern California; hill stability, road safety,

A Severe Weather Alert has been issued.

I am sure you Eastern and East of Paradise types at what fuss weather creates in Southern California.

The air has been really pleasant since those irritable mood creating Santa Ana-s.

Anyone who influenced the rain, sooner rather then later -

Moi

"It's only weather", Captain Call.

(played by James Garner)

[Riverwind (imported)]

Moi, we get sever weather alerts too, that's when the temp drops below -35f for those of you who do C that -40C and -40F are the same so -35 is f%$^#en cold.

Oh yes be the last couple days its only been about -10 when I get up and it warms up to about 20 during the day. I had to put on my hoodie yesterday.

River

[Dave (imported)]

It's 30 F now with winds blowing and chill creeping in through the cracks.

Next week will be in the mid to low 40's ... That's not too bad for mid December.

Last year this area FROZE below 32 F in December and there was a giant snow storm that shut down whole cities just at Christmas.

Nothing like that in sight this year.

[sduyck_2000 (imported)]

the weather has really changed

the rain stopped and days the fog does not hang around we get 40 degrees during the day and 25 at night

Frost seeded wheat and barley yesterday

Have not done that in a couple of years

looks like a drier colder winter for oregon this year...i read that the jet stream will stay in northern california this winter

cant wait for winter to be over...days get longer in a few days

[A-1 (imported)]

Must be nice to look outside and to know what season it is... Where I live Mitch the Bitch has screwed with time so badly that it is dark at 5 PM in the Winter and still light at 11 PM in the Summer. If I didn't know better I'd swear that I must be living just below the Arctic Circle...

Oh, yeah, the IDIOT 'found' 350 MILLION dollars that was 'lost' last week. Kind of nice that the Governor who claims the title of the best money manager of all the Governors in America and a Republican FISCAL CONSERVATIVE (http://www.greenberg-art.com/.Toons/.To ... ive(2).jpg) 'lost' all of that money... Now all of that money that he 'lost' has mysteriously re-appeared now that he is not running for U.S. President...

Sorry it got a little POLITICAL, but it never rains here unless it POURS...

Other than that it has been freezing cold here. But that is not the only thing, you see, that FROSTS YOUR BALLS here, even if you have them in the house in a jar...