Losing the Battle

[tr_80504 (imported)]

I have been fighting HRT for awhile but may have to give in. I have been at castrate level for about a year and a half and was castrated in april of this year. I started this journey as T was ruling my life and taking me places I never thought I would go.

The problem is as of late I have had some problems with depression so I was prescribed paxil and of late fatigue has become over bearing and making it hard to function and work (almost dozed off and went off the road 2xs), so I was prescribed provigil and that doesn't seem to be doing it.

I didn't get castrated to take HRT but the meds and all the energy drinks are not cutting it. I told my GP that the prodigal wasn't doing it and he said he will not proceed till I have a sleep study done. He is also pushing me to start HRT. I haven't went into personal detail about my reasons for castration as that is something I don't want to bring back to the surface nor is it any of his business. There is a lot of shame and disgust buried there and I intend on leaving it there. The problem is that T leads me down a path I don't want to take.

Does anyone have any thing that might help in the way drug alternative or am I possibly doomed to HRT.

terry

[madepeel (imported)]

Well, the good news is that it's possible to get to a dosage that eliminates your current problems without re-igniting the old ones.

The bad news is that you'll have to do a lot of experimenting with dosage to achieve that balance, which will probably be a lot lower dosage than your physician would recommend.

If your GP is willing to work with you, start at a very low dosage with very gradual slight increases until you achieve the balance you are looking for - and be prepared to adjust those dosages in the future, as what is appropriate today may not have the same effectiveness months from now.

Keep us posted - and good luck!

[Losethem (imported)]

I haven't went into personal detail about my reasons for castration as that is something I don't want to bring back to the surface nor is it any of his business.

terry

I understand why you do not wish to discuss "the reasons" with your doctor, but if you want to achieve an appropriate balance in your life, it *is* his business. The doctor cannot help you get the balance you seek unless they know specifically what it is you need or desire to do.

You don't have to go and tell him "I cut my balls off so I could have peace in my life. Those things were fricking annoying the crap out of me..." but you can say things like, "I enjoy the peace that my body chemistry seems to have at this point, but I do wish to solve the other issues... would it be possible to start on a low dose of testosterone and see if it helps solve the present issues without removing the peace I've found in life without the full dose of it?"

Or something along that line...

I think if you do not have a frank and honest discussion with your doctor, you will continue to be disappointed.

--LT

[clysmaniac (imported)]

TR,

We've followed the same basic path to end up without our balls. I found out that after I was surgically castrated, I didn't have any significant issues with depression but I did have issues with poor quality sleep and I lost more strength than I found acceptable plus a bone density exam showed I was into osteopina. I hadn't been taking any calcium up till then so my urologist casually said I should take either some estrogen or testosterone. He would be happy with either and both would help the calcium to be absorbed. I didn't really have any desire to be more feminine so I opted for a testosterone gel, Testim. I went with the gel because it gave me the freedom and ability to control the dose myself. I wanted my T level to be high enough to help with muscle strength and calcium absorbtion but hopefully low enough to keep my libido negligable. For the most of my chemical castration, my testosterone level was just under 100 so that was about the area I was shooting for. After quite a bit of experimenting, I found that 1/2 a tube of Testim every other day put my level at 122. I feel I reached a very reasonable compromise on a level of testosterone that fits my needs best. Sometimes you have to be pragmatic enough to balance things instead of being too rigid. Just a suggestion from someone who has been there as well.

[Sweetpickle (imported)]

Many of those here know how long and hard you worked to get where

you are. It looks like you have another hurdle, but you've handled many

along your way and you can make it through this.

[JessicaH (imported)]

Maybe a tiny dese of esrogen could hep? Maybe the smallest maint dose or small dose every other day. If you get unwanted feminization you could switch to testim.

[hkeunuch (imported)]

Since you do not wish to be feminized or returned to the masculine past, you could look into Tamoxifen. It is an anti-estrogen. It stops feminization, but it does not add any T to the body.

Like estrogen and androgen, it is supposed to help calcium absorption, thus preventing osteoporosis.

[tr_80504 (imported)]

Since you do not wish to be feminized or returned to the masculine past, you could look into Tamoxifen. It is an anti-estrogen. It stops feminization, but it does not add any T to the body.

Like estrogen and androgen, it is supposed to help calcium absorption, thus preventing osteoporosis.

Would estrogen take care of some of the fatigue? Wouldn't that in the end make erections not possible. I do need to satisfy my wife occasionally.

[JessicaH (imported)]

Tamoxafen may kill your drive more than a very low dose of E but everyone is a little different. Tamoxofen is great for the bones as is E. You may just have to play with dosages a bit on different things to see what works for you. I hate that the Provigil didn't do anything for you.