P is for Psycho

[DeaconBlues (imported)]

I can see that yet again, I find myself defending the indefensable, siding with the minority on this one.

First off ibnmichael, I do sincerely hope I am wrong about this, but I do believe you will be going through a long and agonizing period of regret for the loss you will feel. (I was in a similar situation as you and Tugon were, and even though I was genuinely frightened of my partner, I really really regretted the break-up and to this day I regret my decisions regarding that relationship.)

Second, her fetish for snuff films seems just wrong, as most fetishes, the "good and decent people would not approve of such perversions..." She had been indulging your fantasy for some time, yet as she revealed her fantasy, you rejected it. Could you have used a little bit of imagination? Maybe told a white lie or two? Maybe you could have told her something like "Well, I don't know for sure, but I know this guy who did time in the joint (prison) and he told me he knows someone who has a real snuff flick.... I might be able to get a copy..." You would NOT ever actually need to get any real erotic snuff flicks, but you very well could have indulged her fantasy a little bit. Maybe you could even arrange for a "real" video of a snuff flick to be purchased at some seedy little bar... it would not have needed to be a real snuff flick, but she could have fantasized that you had a real honest to goodnesss illegal snuff flick.

On further thought of this fantasy of hers... I strongly suspect that her real fantasy did not involve any real snuff flicks or deaths at all, it DID involve a psychological test, putting you under stress and making you worry a bit. Putting you under stress might not seem to others as a thing anyone who loves you would do, but you had already shown her that you liked certain sorts of erotic stress in your fantasy of getting your parts cut off. By telling you of her very dark and forbidden desires, she now "took it to the next level." Her real fantasy was just to put you in the uncomfortable and stressful situation that you had previously liked in a different form.

I know, I am going to take some severe heat here, I have taken up a decidedly unpopular point of view of this situation - I hope I don't end up getting banned for life. The only consolation I can have for myself is knowing that I sincerely believe in what I have said.

[dfinder (imported)]

IbnMichael,

Always thought your stories were of the highest erotic and writing quality, and thinking you had a playmate who would share and act out your fantasies in a non-threatening way would make me say "Lucky Guy!" - but every silver lining has some rain it seems (Grateful Dead).

There is a perverse streak in most of us humans that that makes us gawk at highway crashes and feel no empathy for the less fortunate among us, as long as they're not members of our "tribe" or family. Most of us have capacity for evil, as the famous Stanford "prisoner" experiments all too quickly validated, or the Yale experiments with fake authorities urging the (actual) test subject to turn up the voltage on a hapless (fake - actor) experimentee behind the glass window. Yet being aware of this capacity is only the first step; we need to vigilantly monitor our actions because it's all too easy to start the slide down that slippery slope from thoughts to action (or inaction, in many cases). To paraphrase (someone famous): "The line between good and evil lies not between nations, nor between political parties, but within every one of us."

That puts our fascination with certain genital transformations and removals, here at EA, in a peculiar light. I think you and I share the belief that while it remains in the fantasy realm, including acting out a fantasy, it's considerably erotic; however anything approaching the real thing (including real pain, or real blood) quickly loses that appeal.

Stories that focus on violent genital destruction, for the sole purpose of causing overwhelming pain, aren't interesting to me. I find myself often reading a story that starts out in an erotically promising way, only to see it descend into an orgy of bloody destruction and intentionally-maximized pain via genital and other forms of abuse, and it becomes a turn-off. I'm not saying this is "wrong" in some moral sense; it's just not compatible with my erotic inclinations, nor, I suspect, with yours.

Best hopes for your finding a new and more empathetic play mate ...

Finder

[IbPervert (imported)]

I know, I am going to take some severe heat here, I have taken up a decidedly unpopular point of view of this situation - I hope I don't end up getting banned for life. The only consolation I can have for myself is knowing that I sincerely believe in what I have said.

Banning is so permanent! However, lets tie you up to a post naked then make you beg to be banned instead is much more interesting! spank:

[ibnmichael (imported)]

I can see that yet again, I find myself defending the indefensable, siding with the minority on this one.

First off ibnmichael, I do sincerely hope I am wrong about this, but I do believe you will be going through a long and agonizing period of regret for the loss you will feel. (I was in a similar situation as you and Tugon were, and even though I was genuinely frightened of my partner, I really really regretted the break-up and to this day I regret my decisions regarding that relationship.)

Second, her fetish for snuff films seems just wrong, as most fetishes, the "good and decent people would not approve of such perversions..." She had been indulging your fantasy for some time, yet as she revealed her fantasy, you rejected it. Could you have used a little bit of imagination? Maybe told a white lie or two? Maybe you could have told her something like "Well, I don't know for sure, but I know this guy who did time in the joint (prison) and he told me he knows someone who has a real snuff flick.... I might be able to get a copy..." You would NOT ever actually need to get any real erotic snuff flicks, but you very well could have indulged her fantasy a little bit. Maybe you could even arrange for a "real" video of a snuff flick to be purchased at some seedy little bar... it would not have needed to be a real snuff flick, but she could have fantasized that you had a real honest to goodnesss illegal snuff flick.

On further thought of this fantasy of hers... I strongly suspect that her real fantasy did not involve any real snuff flicks or deaths at all, it DID involve a psychological test, putting you under stress and making you worry a bit. Putting you under stress might not seem to others as a thing anyone who loves you would do, but you had already shown her that you liked certain sorts of erotic stress in your fantasy of getting your parts cut off. By telling you of her very dark and forbidden desires, she now "took it to the next level." Her real fantasy was just to put you in the uncomfortable and stressful situation that you had previously liked in a different form.

I know, I am going to take some severe heat here, I have taken up a decidedly unpopular point of view of this situation - I hope I don't end up getting banned for life. The only consolation I can have for myself is knowing that I sincerely believe in what I have said.

Well...you see, my fantasy doesn't put me under any stress whatsoever, unless you count the physical reaction from being erotically stimulated as stress. I find it very, very pleasant.

And, no, again, that is actually her taste. She made that clear on many, many occasion, I simply failed to recognize it for what it was.

[ibnmichael (imported)]

IbnMichael,

Always thought your stories were of the highest erotic and writing quality, and thinking you had a playmate who would share and act out your fantasies in a non-threatening way would make me say "Lucky Guy!" - but every silver lining has some rain it seems (Grateful Dead).

There is a perverse streak in most of us humans that that makes us gawk at highway crashes and feel no empathy for the less fortunate among us, as long as they're not members of our "tribe" or family. Most of us have capacity for evil, as the famous Stanford "prisoner" experiments all too quickly validated, or the Yale experiments with fake authorities urging the (actual) test subject to turn up the voltage on a hapless (fake - actor) experimentee behind the glass window. Yet being aware of this capacity is only the first step; we need to vigilantly monitor our actions because it's all too easy to start the slide down that slippery slope from thoughts to action (or inaction, in many cases). To paraphrase (someone famous): "The line between good and evil lies not between nations, nor between political parties, but within every one of us."

That puts our fascination with certain genital transformations and removals, here at EA, in a peculiar light. I think you and I share the belief that while it remains in the fantasy realm, including acting out a fantasy, it's considerably erotic; however anything approaching the real thing (including real pain, or real blood) quickly loses that appeal.

Stories that focus on violent genital destruction, for the sole purpose of causing overwhelming pain, aren't interesting to me. I find myself often reading a story that starts out in an erotically promising way, only to see it descend into an orgy of bloody destruction and intentionally-maximized pain via genital and other forms of abuse, and it becomes a turn-off. I'm not saying this is "wrong" in some moral sense; it's just not compatible with my erotic inclinations, nor, I suspect, with yours.

Best hopes for your finding a new and more empathetic play mate ...

Finder

Thanks so much. That is truly appreciated. And, yes, it sounds as if we share a similar outlook on things.

I've already begun the search for a sane person.

[ibnmichael (imported)]

That doesn't seem so far from having fantasies about mutilating someone against their will/ or being forcibly mutilated by someone. As long as it remains fantasy, I suppose, it's all good fun, yes?

"

This has depressed and disturbed me... so much so that I fel

t it might help to share this with the community

"

I don't think this community is going to

be a place too sympathetic with this particular issue.

Ya think?

(here are a few extra characters to fulfill the 10 unit minimum set by the forum software. We now return you to our regularly scheduled program.......)

[Losethem (imported)]

I read through this and think that in all this talk about snuff and murder you could easily replace those words with castrated and eunuch and elicit a similar response to what many of you have said here from the average person on the street.

I don't advocate living out a snuff fantasy by any stretch of the imagination, but we may want to take a step back and see that the responses here are very similar to those that the eunuch community gets upset about when people do the same thing to us.

Just sayin'.

[Milkman (imported)]

LT,

Very well put !!

I read through this and think that in all this talk about snuff and murder you could easily replace those words with castrated and eunuch and elicit a similar response to what many of you have said here from the average person on the street.

I don't advocate living out a snuff fantasy by any stretch of the imagination, but we may want to take a step back and see that the responses here are very similar to those that the eunuch community gets upset about when people do the same thing to us.

Just sayin'.

[ibnmichael (imported)]

I read through this and think that in all this talk about snuff and murder you could easily replace those words with castrated and eunuch and elicit a similar response to what many of you have said here from the average person on the street.

I don't advocate living out a snuff fantasy by any stretch of the imagination, but we may want to take a step back and see that the responses here are very similar to those that the eunuch community gets upset about when people do the same thing to us.

Just sayin'.

But you still seem to easily see the difference between the two even if the average person doesnt. I'm certain a psychologist would easily see a major difference between the two as well. So do I, thats why she remains.......... scary.

[chilliwilli (imported)]

But you still seem to easily see the difference between the two even if the average person doesnt. I'm certain a psychologist would easily see a major difference between the two as well. So do I, thats why she remains.......... scary.

I agree. Best to stay the hell away. Especially if you want to cut your balls off and she wants to blow your brains out...can't be good...You just can't have both...and well the whole self harm thing...best to just stay away.

chilli-